Well, I’m truly flattered, I am. Tickled pink, even! Dear Cousin Carole has asked me to supply hygiene advice to the thousands – nay! – millions of her blog fans. Of course, it is understood that when we talk about “hygiene” issues, we are referring the whole sphere of personal and inter-personal digital doings and anything at all related to computerised carnal knowledge, be it solo performances (as in viewing films of a sensual nature alone) or involving fellow pixel pals in the joint attempt to achieve mutually satisfying and fulfilling long-distance intercourse. So, my dears, set aside any embarrassment, and feel free to write to Nurse Bertha if you have any worries, concerns or perplexities regarding…erm….you-know-what.
Dear MM,
I’m terribly sorry to have to tell you that your friend has won the bet. You see, it’s perfectly possible to contract a very nasty STD if you've recently used a public loo and haven’t washed your hands thoroughly before fiddling with yourself. Your letter highlights the fact that many people erroneously think that cyber congress is completely without complications.
Remember! Always wash your hands! You can never be too careful!
Nurse Bertha
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